I have received an acknowledgment from G24 and await a contractual parking charge notice through the post addressed to me, Spartacus.
I will keep you posted as to whether I get the thumbs up or down.
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From: Spartacus Lives
Date: Fri, xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: Re: Contractual Parking Charge Notice Number [123456789] issued to [name and address]
To: customer.services@g24.co.uk
Dear G24 Ltd.
Re: Contractual Parking Charge Notice Number [123456789] issued to [name and address] Vehicle registration number [AB 12 CDE]
I am Spartacus. I was the driver of the vehicle on the day in question. I live at the same address as the registered keeper.
You seem to be under the impression that I entered into some kind of contract to pay you £100 to park in [location], but I can confirm that I did not enter into any such contract as I did not see any signs either in, or around the car park.
In fact, even if I had seen the signs I could not have entered into any contract with you, because on the day in question I was an ignorant slave who spoke only Latin (with an American accent), and I could neither read nor write.
Fortunately, a crash course in English has enabled me to write to you to explain the situation. The spelling and grammar checking thingamabob on the computer is also a very useful tool (a crash course in computers was also helpful), and I trust my English is now sufficiently improved for you to understand my case for not paying your invoice.
Me and the lads in the slave army (it's a little project we are working on) reckon that unless you can bring forth the mighty armies of the Roman Empire to force me to pay up or, as is more likely, if you refuse to cancel invoice number 123456789, then perhaps you should issue me with a Popla appeal code.
Please address all future correspondence concerning this matter to: Spartacus, [address]. I look forward to receiving your invoice, appropriately addressed.
Kindly acknowledge safe receipt of this correspondence.
Yours faithfully
Spartacus