This is pretty much how I remember the exchange with Cllr Brian Coleman. I must apologise due to the fact that my recollection may be a bit hazy due to the halitosis breath that was being inflicted on me by Brian during his rant. Apparently I am not the first to comment on this.
Just in case Brian pops in here to see if we are talking about him, may I respectfully remind him of Harry Callaghan's line from the film, The Enforcer.
"Your mouthwash ain't makin' it."
Anyway, as Pat said, dear old Brian wandered in to the delicatessen (it was about 1.30pm I think) where we were having a well earned cup of tea and some cake. I had my back to the door but I knew there was something up when Pat looked over my shoulder and announced. "F*** me! Look what just turned up!" As soon as I saw who it was I could not help the derisory snort that issued forth. Brian must have heard this, but chose to ignore it.
He went to the counter and had some words with the woman behind it, and then proceeded to leave. In my defence, what happened next wasn't my fault. It's the No To Mob's. It's because of you lot I felt bold enough to speak to Brian. So I asked him a simple question as he passed our table.
"Will you be joining the march then Councillor?"
His reply wasn't what I expected. I had asked my question politely and quietly so that only people close and Brian could hear, but obviously Brian felt that all of the deli's occupants should hear his robust defence.
"WHAT MARCH IS THAT THEN?"
Well I couldn't believe that such a well publicised event which got covered by the BBC and mainstream media had slipped by our Brian, particularly when it was mostly as a result of his actions that a large number of his constituents had just marched past the deli we were sitting in.
So I said (quietly). "So it's the usual deny, deny, deny then?"
The whole deli was then treated to one of Brian's famous, halitosis filled tirades.
As I say it's all a bit of a blur, but it went along the lines of "I DON'T CARE FOR YOUR TONE...!" and "I'M NOT HERE IN MY OFFICIAL CAPACITY AND RESENT YOU QUESTIONING ME IN THIS MANNER...! and "I DON'T CARE FOR YOUR TONE...!" and "I'M NOT HAPPY WITH YOU SPEAKING TO ME IN THAT MANNER...! and "I DON'T CARE FOR YOUR TONE...!"
Pat did try to come to my defence by pointing out that I had only asked a civil question but this only met with a "YES. BUT IT WAS THE TONE WITH WHICH HE ASKED IT!". At this point he was looking at the two blokes on the table next to us, presumably in the hope they would back him up.
Fair play to the blokes though. They simply said "Why are you looking at us? We're nothing to do with them [me and Pat]".
Having received no backing from anyone, our Brian promptly turned on his heels and walked out, apparently satisfied that he had successfully batted away another mere mortal who dared to ask him a question that he didn't want to answer.
It was at this point that the deli owner (at least we assume she owned it) came across and asked me what I had asked Brian. When I told her, her reaction was "Oh no. You shouldn't be asking him that kind of thing." I will let you work out what can be read into that particular response.
So there you have it. If I were to listen to Brian and take his advice, then apparently I should never dare question another politician or indeed talk to them. And if one ever deigned to speak to me I should definitely watch my "tone".
Then again, I could take Brian's hostility as a sign that there is definitely something "rotten in the state of [Barnet]" and delve even deeper into its murky depths in an attempt to expose some of the dodgy dealings that so many Barnet residents suspect are going on.
Anyone care to guess which option I will be taking?
I now await my arrest and interview by officers from SO15 (the Met's terrorist squad) for daring to point out that Cllr Brian Coleman is a rude, arrogant, self serving bully, whose breath could stun an ox at 50 paces.
