Author Topic: Pre-dated PCNs  (Read 1280 times)

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Offline DastardlyDick

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Pre-dated PCNs
« on: 24 March, 2015, 09:01:55 AM »

The living relatives of Richard III, the last English king to perish in battle, are now faced with a bill of over £100,000 from Leicester City Council for a parking space the monarch occupied for well over five hundred years.
A spokesman for the council said: ‘We don’t care who you are; you can’t avoid Hawkeye Parking Enforcement sensors. Given that Richard arrived at the site about half a millennium before we installed the system, we didn’t clock him arriving, but we saw the whole exhumation thing. He’s been down there for ages. We are fully within our rights to issue parking fines retrospectively, even to those with alleged spinal disabilities’.
King for only two years, Richard III was fatally wounded at the Battle of Bosworth Field, and will finally be reburied at Leicester Cathedral on Thursday following his famous excavation from the car park back in 2012.
Despite this being the first occasion that a parking fine has been issued from an era that predates the car park itself, the council insist they have treated Richard fairly:  ‘In accordance with the latest parking laws, once his twisted bones were exhumed, we were obliged to give him a ten-minute grace period to remove himself off the site completely.
‘Even after this fair and generous treatment, he still continued to just lie there, blocking the path of a Renault Megane Coupe that had already paid for a ticket.’
Defending the deceased monarch, MP Eric Pickles, who recently declared an end to the ‘war on motorists’, said: ‘Not only are we now ending the war on drivers who simply want to go about their daily business, but we will now extend this to kings who just want to die valiantly in battle and be buried underneath council-run car parking facilities without the fear of being financially penalised several centuries later. If that’s not an election winner then I don’t know what is.’